Godzilla vs Popeye
Godzilla vs Popeye is a What If? Death Battle. Description It's east vs. west as these two overpowered heroes face off! Intro (Cue this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uihVrASDQhU) Wiz: America and Japan have been rivals for many centuries, and they've always done their best to prove they're better. Boomstick: So in the 80's, they had a competition to see who was the most overpowered fucker they could come up with! Wiz: Like Popeye, the Sailorman Boomstick: And Godzilla, the King of all Monsters. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick! Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle? Popeye (Cue this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvPs6A4eyBI) Boomstick: He's just a sailor! How he's supposed to fight? Wiz: You'd be surprised, but he's much more powerful than he looks. Although he has no origin, he's not really known for that. Boomstick: His favorite food is Spinach! Like, why? Spinach sucks. Wiz: It is pretty bad, but it gives Popeye his all powerful strength. Even without it, he's a beast in combat. Boomstick: Yeah, he's able to lift giant ships and punch Bluto so hard he becomes a baby? Like, what the fuck!? Wiz: He's done much more than that. He's destroyed a comet with his bare hands, pulled the Grand Canyon back together with nothing but a lasso, and parted the Red Seas just by walking through it. Boomstick: Speaking of other feats, his corn pipe is able to do lots of stuff. It can break through walls and block projectiles. And then there's his Spinach. Oh god. Wiz: When the sailor gulps down Spinach, he becomes as strong as Bugs Bunny. With the enhancements, he's immune to reality warping, hypnotism, and can break the fourth wall. Yes, he did it before Deadpool. Boomstick: But instead of making horrible jokes, he uses it as an advantage! He can ask the audience to help him, and can even talk to the animators, and once he even beat them up! He can also escape from his world into our world and mess shit up with ease! Wiz: Also, if he is somehow killed, giving him a cup of spinach can bring him back to life in no time. He's also able to punch animals so hard, they become fresh beef. Boomstick: Did I mention the time where he blew out the Sun like a candle? Or how about the time where he punched Bluto into the real world? Or how about when he pulled the moon closer to the earth? Or when he hit Bluto so hard he rearranged the comets? Wiz: This is because of Toon Force, which makes cartoon characters like Mickey and Bugs almost undefeatable. Boomstick: But if someone else gulps down the Spinach, they gain Popeye's strength and he's kinda dumb. But with feats like that, you'd better think twice before messing with Popeye. Popeye: I'm Popeye the Sailor Man. I'm Popeye the Sailor Man. I'm strong to the finich, 'cause I eats me spinach, I'm Popeye the Sailor Man! Godzilla (Cue this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vE-JwmDrTNI) Wiz: Since the cavemen ages, a gigantic prehistoric creature laid dormat under the earth for many centuries. But when the Americans bombed Japan, the creature awoke, and boy was it angry. Boomstick: So as a greeting to Japan, the Big G decides to rampage through the city, but was defeated when the Japanese bombed him, forcing him to go back. Wiz: Nowadays, Godzilla protects Japan from evil Kaiju monsters like Ghidorah and Mothra. Boomstick: Wait, what? One of his enemies is a fucking moth? Is that a joke? Wiz: I wish it was. Boomstick: His main way of attacking, aside from using his strength, is his infamous Atomic Breath, which is basically Godzilla firing a blue beam from his mouth. It's capable of destroying buildings with ease. Wiz: Nuclear Pulse is basically where Godzilla absorbs all the nuclear energy and creates an explosion. Boomstick: He also has a healing factor. What's with these Deadpool abilities appearing in our episodes? Anyway, he has Magnetic Powers, where is able to control things made out of magnets, obviously. Wiz: Godzilla also has a Kaiju Battle record, which is 44 wins, 9 losses and 7 ties. Boomstick: You'd think he'd win all the time since he's the hero. Wiz: Godzilla has evenly matched Thor's strength, battled Rodan for 12 hours, regenerated from just a beating heart, and beat 10 monsters in a row during Final Wars. He also picked up and threw King Ghidorah, who weighs over 3 tons. Boomstick: But Godzilla is sensitive to light, and nuclear bombs are his kryptonite. Also, despite being very durable, he's REALLY slow and he can't tank attacks forever and will eventually die. Wiz: And don't forget the time where he got beat up by King Kong. Boomstick: But even with all these flaws, he's still the King of the Monsters for a reason. Godzilla uses his drop kick on Megalon. Death Battle For reasons unknown, the cartoon sailor Popeye was in Japan, looking through a shop for some spinach. Many Japanese people were confused why Popeye would want spinach over stuff like Orange Chicken or Rice, but they didn't dare ask. Just as Popeye was gonna buy some flowers for Olive Oyl, he heard loud footsteps that shook the earth. Popeye looked up and saw people run from the gigantic beast, Godzilla. Random person: Run for your lives! Another person: He'll kill us all! Popeye saw the monster grab a building and throw it into the ocean, causing the building to sink, but no people were inside, thus no one was killed. Popeye, not liking this beast's choices, decided to teach Godzilla a lesson. Popeye: Hey, you, ya big Palooka! Godzilla looked down at Popeye. Popeye: I dun' know what's yer probl'm, but eith'r ya scram or I'll make ya! Godzilla roared at Popeye, accepting his challenge. Popeye: I g'ess I'll haf' to do this the hard way. Fight! (Cue this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4js5xdXPJLk) Godzilla attempts to stomp on Popeye, who grabs the foot and throws Godzilla back, causing the Big G to trip and hit a building, destroying it. Popeye leaped to the top of the building with his toon powers. Godzilla roars angrily and gets up and fires a blast of his Atomic Breath, missing very easily. Popeye: Now yo'll g't what's comin'! Popeye leaps towards Godzilla and delivers a solid punch to the face, causing Godzilla to roar in pain as he stumbled back. However, Popeye managed to cling on to Godzilla's body and starts punching him in the jaw. However, the sailor pushed his luck when he tried to hit Godzilla again, only for his hand to get bit. Popeye: YEOW! Popeye's hand started to swell, as he fell into Godzilla's hand. Godzilla, now having the advantage, smashed Popeye against a building over and over, bruising Popeye, right before shooting an Atomic Breath on Popeye, hurling Popeye into a building. Godzilla then shot another Atomic Breath at the building, causing the building to explode, with Popeye right in it. Godzilla roared a loud roar of victory before walking away. However, he heard a familiar, annoying voice from behind emerge. Popeye: You sure ar' one tuff palooka! But now, pr'pare to feel it once I g't my spin'ch out! Popeye searches his pockets for some spinach, but to no avail, while Godzilla watches in confusion. Seeing that this is an open chance to strike, Godzilla swings his tail at Popeye, knocking the wind out of the sailor as he was hurled back. Popeye quickly dodges another foot stomp and breaks the fourth wall, leaving the arena and entering my household. He goes to my fridge and happens to find a can of spinach. He leaves without saying a word, going back to the arena, where he should be! Popeye hides behind some rubble and gulps down some spinach, and gains a major powered up boost. Now feeling full powered up, he looks around for Godzilla, but it doesn't take long, seeing how big he is. (Cue this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QpW7x-kWlDY) Popeye: Hey ya palooka! Godzilla turns around and rushes towards Popeye. He wanted to end this and now, so he started absorbing some of the nuclear energy around him, making him bigger. Popeye, not sure what he was doing, rushed up to him and performed a jumping punch, hitting Godzilla in the stomach, knocking the monster down. Godzilla, after absorbing all the energy, explodes, causing the entire area to catch on fire. Godzilla and Popeye get back up and rush up to each other, quickly trading blows. Godzilla shoots another Atomic Breath, but Popeye whips out a mirror thanks to Hammerspace, reflecting it back towards Godzilla, knocking Big G down. Popeye pulls out a tall ladder from hammerspace, and climbs up Godzilla and walks over to the big monster, and lights his corn pipe on fire. Popeye: So l'ng! (Cue this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMdI_fozMYg) Popeye, now with a fully lit corn pipe, draws a hole on Godzilla's chest, causing Godzilla's stomach to fry and open up, blood and guts everywhere. Popeye then pulled out his anchor, and threw it inside Godzilla's stomach, fishing around for his heart. He accidently caught some of his organs, and put them in a bag for Olive. After some more fishing around Godzilla's stomach, he finally found the heart! Popeye chuckled as he dipped the heart in water, put some salt and pepper on it, and ate it. It tasted pretty good! Popeye, as always, decided to sing about his victory and carried the bag off with him Oh, he was a f'ghter, But I beat 'im w'th a lighter! Now I must be g'ing, on my boat I be rowin'. 'Cause I'm Popeye the Sailor Man! (toot toot) KO! Popeye is seen rowing back to his house. Scientists are seen performing experiments on Godzila's dead body. Results Boomstick: What the fuck just happened! Wiz: Cartoon logic. Anyway, while Godzilla was bigger and physically stronger, that's where his advantages end. Not only was Popeye stronger, but he was more durable, and MUCH MUCH faster than Big G. Boomstick: It's sad, but true. Godzilla had no counter to Popeye's insane toon force, and with Popeye's immense speed advantage, he wouldn't be able to catch up to him, and since he's huge, he'd become nothing more than a giant punching bag. Wiz: And while Godzilla is strong enough to lift King Ghidorah, Popeye is strong enough to not only lift the earth, but is able to destroy comets, and able to punch Bluto so hard he became a baby. He also was able to blow out the sun, something Godzilla could never do. Boomstick: "Oh, but wouldn't the Atomic Breath instantly kill Popeye?" Wiz: No, not actually. Popeye has survived complete disintegration and was once erased from existence, but was brought back after he ate spinach. Also, even if Popeye was defeated, the spinach would bring him back to life, and if he runs out, he can always break the fourth wall to get more. Boomstick: Looks like Popeye Toon Forced Godzilla to fail. Wiz: The winner is Popeye Advantages and Disadvantages Popeye - WINNER *+Faster *+Cartoon logic hax *+Smarter *+Stronger *= In Durability *-Smaller Godzilla - LOSER *+Bigger *= In Durability *-Everything else Category:Pikells Category:Human vs Creature themed DEATH BATTLEs Category:'East vs West' themed Death Battles Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:Death Battles with a returning combatant Category:'Shonen Jump vs Warner Bros' themed Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? 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